I forgot I had this. Ooops.
In the interim, things have happened.
I now have a twelve year old and a seven year old. The twelve year old is feeling the first chill winds of puberty. If he were female, I'd say he had drama queen and diva tendencies. I foresee adolescence with him involving him finding somewhere unaccessible and weeping about his life and writing long journal entries about his feelings and how no one understands him. Mind you, I understand this because that was what I did, but that doesn't make the whole process easier.
The seven year old is still intense. It's better than it was when he was younger, owing to the greater impulse control and maturity, but he's still way more vivid than his brother. Winter is harder because it's harder to put him outside and let him run it off.
And the health issues.
I'm seeing a rheumatologist now, and it's working out okay. He really wants to manage me more with antidepressants than sleeping pills, and I am not so fond of it thanks to the sexual dysfunction part of things. Husband and I have trouble enough making time between his pains and my pains, I don't need that added to it. We figured out, however, what the horrendous back spasms and pain were being caused by. Apparently the cast ten years ago was heavy enough to stretch my right leg. A quarter-inch pad shoved under my left heel mostly cured everything in three days. I had muscle relaxants, however, and they resulted in another good discovery and solution.
I used to have profoundly shitty periods. It all began with diarrhea, combined with a bout of depression. And then I'd start to cramp. From the arch of my ribs to my knees in front, from my shoulderblades to my tailbone in back. My perineum felt bruised, and the shifting of tissue as I would sit down caused more pain. My back muscles radiated heat like a sunburn. I couldn't sit, I couldn't lay down, I had to pace, though it was more a stagger, moaning and weeping in pain. It felt like having a baby, except there wasn't an end. This lasted for about three days each month, and I had to use pads because inserting a tampon made the cramps come back. And then, while I was on the muscle relaxants to unknot my right lumbar area, I came to my period. And level 9 pain was kicked down to a 4. I live with a 4, I can handle 4, no problem. True, I'm not going to be tossing heavy objects about or hauling stuff up and down the stairs, but I can at least manage to cook and do the dishes. This is what I call a good deal.
So while I feel better, there's still issues. One being that the gas is still off, and it's getting chillier. But as soon as someone buys my van, that will be resolved. I really resent the financial issues, and wish I had the stamina to work. But given that I don't have the stamina to do the laundry half the time, I'm not even going to go out and try.
In the interim, things have happened.
I now have a twelve year old and a seven year old. The twelve year old is feeling the first chill winds of puberty. If he were female, I'd say he had drama queen and diva tendencies. I foresee adolescence with him involving him finding somewhere unaccessible and weeping about his life and writing long journal entries about his feelings and how no one understands him. Mind you, I understand this because that was what I did, but that doesn't make the whole process easier.
The seven year old is still intense. It's better than it was when he was younger, owing to the greater impulse control and maturity, but he's still way more vivid than his brother. Winter is harder because it's harder to put him outside and let him run it off.
And the health issues.
I'm seeing a rheumatologist now, and it's working out okay. He really wants to manage me more with antidepressants than sleeping pills, and I am not so fond of it thanks to the sexual dysfunction part of things. Husband and I have trouble enough making time between his pains and my pains, I don't need that added to it. We figured out, however, what the horrendous back spasms and pain were being caused by. Apparently the cast ten years ago was heavy enough to stretch my right leg. A quarter-inch pad shoved under my left heel mostly cured everything in three days. I had muscle relaxants, however, and they resulted in another good discovery and solution.
I used to have profoundly shitty periods. It all began with diarrhea, combined with a bout of depression. And then I'd start to cramp. From the arch of my ribs to my knees in front, from my shoulderblades to my tailbone in back. My perineum felt bruised, and the shifting of tissue as I would sit down caused more pain. My back muscles radiated heat like a sunburn. I couldn't sit, I couldn't lay down, I had to pace, though it was more a stagger, moaning and weeping in pain. It felt like having a baby, except there wasn't an end. This lasted for about three days each month, and I had to use pads because inserting a tampon made the cramps come back. And then, while I was on the muscle relaxants to unknot my right lumbar area, I came to my period. And level 9 pain was kicked down to a 4. I live with a 4, I can handle 4, no problem. True, I'm not going to be tossing heavy objects about or hauling stuff up and down the stairs, but I can at least manage to cook and do the dishes. This is what I call a good deal.
So while I feel better, there's still issues. One being that the gas is still off, and it's getting chillier. But as soon as someone buys my van, that will be resolved. I really resent the financial issues, and wish I had the stamina to work. But given that I don't have the stamina to do the laundry half the time, I'm not even going to go out and try.
posted by Alexandra Lynch at 8:16 PM
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